Sanctuary.

I like my blog because from what I know its kind of a secret.. not a well kept one because there's a link to it on my myspace page but

[whoa creepiest sense of deja vu.. reading as I'm typing and then this wave of uncomfortable familiarity rolls over me.. ugh.]

Anyway, I like this blog. I like it because its an open forum that I can say whatever I want in and don't have to deal with a bunch of comments & no texts about if I'm ok or what I meant, etc. I'd like to think of myself as a pretty straight forward individual though trying to be polite has often clouded the vision of others and this is something I am only now coming to realize.

Today I have a dilemma.. 2 kind of but only 1 that kind of matters. You see I am a young adult. I am also a woman. I am also dating, which has proven to be a less than stellar series of events & mishaps. I just don't get men. I think I have tried to my whole life to no avail. Its strange because I was raised on terms of ladylike etiquette & the ideas of chivalry but at this current stage of my existence none of that matters. If you're a bitch dudes won't leave you alone. If you're a sweetheart they treat you like shit or not like "shit" but not well. Not like someone who is treating someone else nicely or like they want them around. I personally am really nice to people that I take the time to know & spend time with, that I'd like to spend more time with. This is not the case with my male peers. They are, for lack of better word, retarded. From my recent experiences all I can tell you is that pretty much anything goes. There are no spoken boundaries and I have yet to come to a wall. Unless you count assuming that you & someone were not talking anymore, as per your choice & skillful evasion tactics but then having to fulfill a date planned a month in advance. That's no wall. That's just awkward and that's the dilemma that is actually troubling me. I just don't get it. When you literally say to someone that you are not that girl in response to them saying they want you to be their girl and refuse or bail on any & all hang out attempts, where is the confusion? I don't see it. But no... things can't just die out gracefully. Now a night of not being someone's girlfriend and correcting everyone who says so. FML.

Dude, Karma is beautiful. All of my enemies & bad exes are apparently getting owned these days by life. Its like the universe is paying me a fierce solid and I am so down. This goes to show that vengeance is completely unnecessary and bitches get what's coming to them in the most entertaining of forms sometimes. I love that.

I have to go to work. I blame facebook for my scatterbrained posts. Its ok.